


The Secret Admirer

by dejong679



Category: Sanditon (TV 2019), Sanditon - Jane Austen
Genre: F/M, Romance, Secret Admirer, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-13 09:08:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29399556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dejong679/pseuds/dejong679
Summary: It is Valentine's Day and Charlotte Heywood is surprised to find herself in receipt of a valentines card from a secret admirer who wants to meet with her that evening. Even with the help of her friends, she cannot seem to work out who has sent it. What will she think when she finally discovers who it is?A two part story posted as part of the Sanditon Fanfiction Valentines Challenge.
Relationships: Charlotte Heywood/Sidney Parker
Comments: 87
Kudos: 258





	1. Part 1

“God I hate this day!” Georgiana groaned as she and Charlotte made their way down to breakfast in the dining room of their University Halls of Residence. The Social Committee had decorated the place with pink, white and red balloons and heart shaped bunting was hung from the ceiling. Charlotte couldn’t help thinking that all this tat was completely unnecessary, and only served to remind those who were singletons that they were very much alone.

“Why should you hate this day, you’ve got a boyfriend? If anything it is us singletons that should be complaining.” Charlotte replied.

“I may have a boyfriend, but he is in Newcastle while I’m in Oxford. This day makes me dwell on the fact that we are living miles apart.” Georgiana commented.

Charlotte rolled her eyes at her. Georgiana’s daily pining for her boyfriend, Otis, was rather wearing. They meandered to the dining hall, stopping via the post room to collect their mail. Georgiana went first, and the Porter handed over a parcel. Georgiana’s eyes lit up, for it was clearly from Otis.

Charlotte smiled at her lovesick friend. “Looks like Otis has come up trumps.”

Georgiana smiled coyly. “Yes, it appears so.”

“Hi George. Any post for Charlotte Heywood?” She asked the Porter who went to check the pigeon holes. He came back with a red envelope and handed it over. Charlotte frowned as she took it from him, for the last thing she was expecting was a valentines card.

“Oh my God, who is that from?” Georgiana asked.

“I don’t know.” Charlotte replied, suddenly feeling really nervous. The last time she had received a valentines card was when she was 10 years old from Timothy Green who was her boyfriend at the time…

“Aren’t you going to open it?”

“OK.” Charlotte said as she ripped it open and pulled out the card. It was a really simple red card with a white question mark on it.

On the inside it said:

_Dear Charlotte_

_Roses are red_

_Violets are blue_

_Time for my confession:_

_I really like you._

_I am not great with words,_

_And my poetry is rubbish,_

_But I’m hoping that despite that_

_You’ll grant me just one wish…_

_By the Tom Gate of Christ Church College,_

_At 7pm tonight_

_Meet me there, (I’m not a serial killer I swear)_

_I’ll be holding something white._

_Be my valentine._

_Love your Secret Admirer._

_xxxxx_

Charlotte had to read the the card a few times and she found her heart started to pound. Someone wanted to meet her… tonight… a secret admirer… and she had absolutely no idea who it could be.

“Charlotte Heywood, you have a secret admirer! Who do you think it is?” Georgiana exclaimed.

“Honestly, I can’t think of anyone.”

“What about James?”

Charlotte pulled a face. “No, we’re just friends.”

“Are you sure about that? I mean, you were in his room until midnight the other night.”

“We were binging The Witcher on his Netflix, nothing else happened. Besides, he has a girlfriend back home.”

“Exactly… at home, whereas you are here.”

“Nothing happened.” Charlotte emphasised.

Georgiana shrugged. “Fine. What about Edward?”

“Edward has his eyes set on Clara, you know that.” Charlotte replied.

“Your course mate, what’s his name?”

“Fred?” Charlotte clarified.

“Yes, him.”

“Definitely not!”

“Dave?”

“No way!”

“Steve?”

“Are you seriously just going to list every male I’ve ever had a conversation with?” Charlotte asked.

Georgiana shrugged. “I’m just curious that’s all. Oh what if it’s not a ‘him’, but a ‘her’?”

Charlotte pondered this for a moment. “I think everyone knows I’m straight, but it could be.”

They got to the front of the queue for breakfast. “So are you going to meet with him/her?” Asked Georgiana.

“I’m not sure… I suppose I’ve got nothing to lose, have I? And it’s not like I have any plans for tonight.”

Georgiana rolled her eyes at her. “That wasn’t a very enthusiastic response.”

Charlotte shrugged. “I just don’t understand why this person has to keep his identity secret.”

“Come on, Charlotte, that’s the point of Valentine’s Day isn’t it? I think it’s rather romantic!”

“You would think that, because you’re a hopeless romantic!”

“Yes I am. A hopeless romantic and proud! Look, if you’re worried about meeting him, I could always come with you, just in case?” Georgiana offered.

Charlotte giggled. “You mean you just want to come and find out who it is.”

Georgiana grinned. “Well of course.”

“I’ll think about it.”

They found a table and sat down with their tray of breakfast. “So what have you got on today?” Charlotte asked Georgiana.

“I’ve got an essay due in next week I really need to get started on. Then this afternoon I have two hours of Contract Law followed by two hours of Criminal Law.” Georgiana groaned. “What about you?”

“I’ve got a tutorial in an hour.” Charlotte said a little gloomily, but she was really not looking forward to it.

“The Jane Austen one?”

“Yes.” Charlotte confirmed, sighing heavily.

“Is that the one with the wanker in it who keeps arguing with you?”

“Yes. It’s really the last thing I want to be doing today, but never mind.”

“I’ll swap if you like? I’ll do the tutorial and you write my essay?”

Charlotte smiled. “No, I’m good thanks.”

Georgiana and Charlotte finished their breakfast and then headed back to their rooms, which were next door to each other.

“Well, good luck with the essay.” said Charlotte.

“Oh, Charlotte, about tonight, I can help you get ready if you like?” Georgiana said excitedly.

“God, do you think I need to dress up?”

“Well… it’s always good to make a bit of an effort.” Georgiana said, looking at her friend’s wild brown locks which seemed to have a mind of their own.

“Fine. But not too much make up… and I’m NOT straightening my hair. It will never stay in place in this weather.” Charlotte replied, thinking she didn’t even know who this person was, so why bother making the effort when she may have to let him/her down gently. “This person may not be the person of my dreams after all.”

Georgiana shook her head. “Do you have romantic bone in that body of yours, Miss Heywood?”

“Yes, it’s just reserved for the right person.” Charlotte explained. “Right… I really need to get to my tutorial.”

“OK. See you at the canteen for lunch?”

“Sure. Bye.”

Charlotte went back into her room, grabbed her laptop and books and headed out class. She was a massive Jane Austen fan, and this had been the main reason why she had chosen to study English Literature at Oxford University. However, even though the subject matter was interesting to her, the tutorial was one of her least favourite lessons because there was one person in the group who always sought to start a debate with her: Sidney Parker. He was a third year Philosophy student, but had decided to take this module this Semester, goodness knows why, and his philosophical way of thinking was really irritating. It was getting beyond ridiculous, for they would spend most of the tutorial bickering and the tutor, Mrs Griffiths, would always have to act as Mediator. The fact was that Sidney just did not appreciate the true essence of Austen. He was too much of a realist, insisting that her happily ever afters did not make sense in a regency setting. For example, he said there was no way Darcy would choose Elizabeth Bennett, because her status was so beneath his own and it just didn’t make sense - more than that he was already engaged to Anne de Bourgh and to break that engagement would have been a scandal. In addition, Sidney argued that it was really unrealistic for Wentworth to have remained single for eight years, and why would he have gone back to Anne Elliot after she wounded him so greatly?

To make such comments almost seemed like an outrage to Charlotte. She adored the romance between Anne and Wentworth, and Elizabeth and Darcy for that matter, and to see someone tear it apart and declare it as unrealistic was infuriating and insulting. She knew Jane Austen novels were not realism, and that was the point of it! If Sidney wanted a tragedy, he should be studying Emily Bronte, not Jane Austen! Austen was the Queen of happily ever afters - wasn’t that the draw of her writing anyway? So here they were again, on a Friday morning, lining up waiting for the tutorial, this time to discuss Sense and Sensibility, and even the sight of Sidney leaning against the wall, his arms crossed in front of him and a stupid smirk on his face vexed her. Charlotte tried to offer him a polite smile, but really all she wanted to do was to scowl at him.

“Hello Charlotte. Ready for another fun tutorial?” He said with a slight smile on his face and she rolled her eyes at him. He would not put her off with his pretty boy smile.

“You mean another chance for you to ridicule Jane Austen’s happily every afters?”

Sidney chuckled. “I was just trying to highlight the fact that Jane Austen’s books give unrealistic ideas of romance - even in the regency period.”

“No one wants realism! That’s the point of her writings.”

“I thought the point of her writings was to explore the very essence of how and why people fall in love…”

Charlotte was a little flummoxed by his response and she looked at him suspiciously. “Don’t tell me you’ve suddenly changed your position and gone all romantic on me?”

Sidney gave her an unreadable look. “You think I’m unromantic?”

“Why else would you argue against a happily ever after?”

“Just because I think it is idealistic doesn’t mean that I am not a fan of a happily ever after.” He replied, his expression rather intense.

Charlotte frowned at him. “That doesn’t make any sense because you’ve spent the whole Semester arguing to the contrary.”

“Maybe I just like debating with you.”

Charlotte was still frowning. “You mean you like provoking me.”

Sidney shrugged, his eyes refusing to look away from hers and it bothered her. It bothered her a lot because it was like he was trying to intimidate her before doing battle with her and his powers of intimidation were working because she felt increasing annoyed. She tore her eyes away from his determined not to let him see her rattled.

They presently were called in by Mrs Griffiths and the class traipsed into the classroom and took their seats.

“Hi Charlotte. Did you get any valentines cards?” Her classmate Fred asked her. He was sat with her other friend Susan.

Charlotte turned to face Fred, studying him for any hint that perhaps he had sent the valentines card now that Georgiana had put the thought in her head. “Yes, I did actually.”

“Who from?”

“I don’t know, it was anonymous.”

Susan raised an eyebrow. “So Charlotte Heywood has a secret admirer?”

“That appears to be the case. Did either of you get any?” She asked.

Susan shook her head and Fred said. “Nah. You going to the Valentine’s Ball tonight?”

“No, I didn’t get a ticket.” Charlotte replied, thinking if Fred was going out tonight, then he was unlikely to be her secret admirer.

“I’m sure they’re still selling some on the door. Should be a laugh.” Commented Fred.

“I dunno… isn’t it just going to be full of desperate singletons wanting to find someone to hook up with in attempt to forget that they are miserable and alone?” Charlotte blurted out loud and someone chuckled behind her. She really ought to try and keep her opinions to herself!

Susan laughed at her too. “Well of course it is!”

“In which case, it is not for me.”

“So you’re not miserable and alone then?” Fred asked, and again it raised her suspicions a little.

Eager not to give Fred the wrong impression she said. “No. I am happily single, thank you very much.”

Fred rolled his eyes at her. “Whatever. Holding out for your secret admirer are you?”

Charlotte shrugged in response.

“Is there someone you hope it could be?” Susan asked.

“No. Like I said, I am happily single. I have not even entertained the thought of dating someone.”

Their conversation was brought to a halt by Mrs Griffiths calling the class to order. Charlotte glanced in Sidney’s direction as she drew herself up straight and readied herself for another argument with him. She wondered what Sidney could possibly say about Sense and Sensibility that would seek to ruin everything she loved about the book, idealistic or not, for this was her favourite story out of all of Austen’s novels. Sidney looked back at her with an expression she had not seen before. Usually he would smirk at her because he enjoyed irritating her, but right now, he was frowning at her as though he were confused, or even a little disappointed. Charlotte shook her head. No, this was just Sidney Parker trying to get in her head and she would not let him. She would defend her heroine, her inspiration, her role model to the bitter end if she had to…

…“Bloody hell, Charlotte Heywood, you really went for it against that Parker guy today!” Fred said in a hushed voice as they exited the class.

“I had no choice! He said that Willoughby was not a villain, but a creature of circumstance.”

“He has a bit of a point…” Susan replied.

“Not you too! Willoughby will always be a scoundrel in my eyes. He frolicked around with Marianne when he knew there was no way they could marry and broke her heart…”

“Yes… we know. We don’t have to go back through it all again…” Fred said exasperatedly.

“Sorry. But he really gets to me. He even admitted he likes provoking me.”

“Then why give him the satisfaction of letting him see you get all wound up?” Susan asked.

Charlotte sighed. “You’re right. I shouldn’t. I just can’t help it. He inspires an anger in me, and I’m not usually an angry person.”

“I suppose sometimes certain people just get under our skin.” Susan said with a smirk on her face.

At that moment, Sidney brushed past them. Charlotte glanced at him nervously. Had he heard what she said? He didn’t meet her eyes, but still had that troubled/disappointed expression on his face. Well, he knew what she felt about him anyway so there was no point in hiding it. “Right, better dash, I’m meeting someone for coffee.”

“Your secret admirer?” Susan asked.

“No. Just a friend.” Charlotte replied, but thinking that in reality, he could well be a secret admirer…

Charlotte left the building, making sure she kept enough distance between her and Sidney Parker who she could still see walking with purpose in front of her. Thankfully he didn’t look back at her, but unfortunately he seemed to be headed in the same direction as he went into the coffee shop just before her.

Charlotte was meeting her friend (at least she thought they were just friends), James, outside the coffee shop and he was running a bit late. She waited for a few more minutes, when the door of the coffee shop opened and Sidney walked out with his takeaway coffee. Charlotte tried to shrink back into the shadows, but there was nowhere to hide. Sidney saw her and opened his mouth to say something, but James showed up just at the right time.

“Sorry I’m late. Professor Woodhouse ran over time.” James said and Charlotte breathed a sigh of relief, grateful that she did not have to engage again with Sidney. Out of the corner of her eye, Charlotte saw Sidney walk off, but not before he stopped to look back at her with a strange expression on his face.

“No problem.” Charlotte said as they headed into the coffee shop.

“My turn to pay today.” James said. He went to join the queue to buy the coffees while Charlotte grabbed a table. She checked her phone and saw a message from Georgiana.

_Georgie: Any ideas yet?_

_Charlotte: None._

_Georgie: Curious._

“Here we are.” James said as he handed over her coffee and sat down at the table and Charlotte hastily put her phone away. “And I got you this.” He added, handing over a heart chocolate lollipop. “Happy Valentine’s Day.” He said with a cute smile on his face.

The chocolate heart made Charlotte uncomfortable. Was Georgiana right after all about James being her secret admirer? “Thanks… but don’t you have a girlfriend?” Charlotte said, trying to keep her voice light.

James chuckled. “Yes. Don’t worry, the gesture is not intended to be romantic. It came free with the coffee.”

“Phew! You nearly worried me there.” Charlotte teased, but secretly she was relieved. James was a really good friend and she didn’t want anything to ruin that friendship.

James smiled. “I’m not sure if I should be offended by that reaction or not.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s fine. You’re like a sister to me… it would be weird to consider you as anything more. Besides, I’m travelling home later tonight to see Lucy.” James clarified as he took a sip of his coffee.

“Planning a romantic surprise then?” Charlotte asked.

“That’s the plan.”

James proceeded to explain to Charlotte all about the grand gestures he had planned for his girlfriend Lucy. He was a real romantic, but definitely not her secret admirer. Charlotte was still no where near to finding out who that could be. After a short coffee break and catch up with James, Charlotte headed to the library to spend a couple of hours reading in preparation for her lecture this afternoon on Shakespeare’s Sonnets, completely oblivious to the guy who kept glancing up at her from across the room. When it was lunch time, she went to the cafeteria to meet Georgiana, Edward and Esther at the canteen.

When she arrived at the canteen, Georgiana looked miserable and Charlotte almost didn’t want to ask what was wrong because she thought she knew what it would be about. However, Georgiana was her friend, and she felt she ought to enquire further.

“How’s the essay going?” Charlotte asked Georgiana tentatively as they sat down with their lunches at the table.

“It’s not. I spent most of the morning on the phone with Otis.”

“Oh?” Charlotte said, trying to seem interested, but this was she was expecting to hear.

“We got into a fight.”

“Why?”

Georgiana shrugged. “I think the distance is putting a real strain on things. I’m not sure I can do this anymore.”

“I get it, but we’re half way through the term. Only a few more weeks to go and you’ll see him again.”

“Yes I know.” She sighed. “Anyway, in other news, I bumped into Dave and he said that he’s going to the Valentine’s Ball tonight and he also mentioned Steve is sick with flu, so that rules both of them out as being your secret admirer.”

“I never thought they were.”

“I still think it’s James.” Georgiana maintained.

“It’s not, I saw him for coffee. He’s travelling back home tonight to surprise his girlfriend.” Charlotte clarified.

“What are you two whispering about?” Edward asked.

Georgiana gave Charlotte a sly smile. “Charlotte’s secret admirer.”

Edward’s eyebrows raised in intrigue. “Charlotte has a secret admirer?”

“Uh huh. He’s asked Charlotte to meet him tonight.”

“I bet it’s James” Esther said, a smile on her face.

“Not you as well? Seriously, can’t a girl and guy just be friends?” protested Charlotte.

“Yes, but you meet him every day for coffee.”

“So?”

“So, you’re spending a lot of time together… it makes you think whether at least one of you wants something more.” Esther observed. “Don’t you agree Edward?”

“Guys are only friends with girls they find attractive.” Edward confirmed.

Georgiana grinned. “So _you_ find Charlotte attractive then?”

“Of course.” He replied unapologetically with a smile.

“Then are you her secret admirer?”

“No. Granted, I can see why you came to that conclusion, but it’s not me. I have my own plans for tonight with a lucky lady.” He replied with a smirk.

“Then it must be James.” Esther repeat.

“It is not James! He’s going home tonight to surprise his girlfriend.” Charlotte reiterated.

“So he says.” Georgiana said.

“I very much doubt it’s a ruse. He said he thinks of me as a sister.” Charlotte assured them.

“Ah, the sister thing… yes it’s definitely him.” Edward added.

“Guys, seriously, it’s not! In fact, I’m beginning to think it is just someone playing a trick because there are literally no candidates.”

“Surely there must be someone you suspect?” Esther asked.

“No, there isn’t.”

“But you’re still going to meet them, aren’t you?” said Georgiana.

Charlotte sighed heavily. “Yes, I suppose so.”

“Good, because I have plans for your hair.”

“You’re getting all dolled up?” Esther asked.

“Nothing elaborate, but she needs to make a bit of an effort. It is a date after all!” Georgiana said, answering for her.

“Well, we’ll expect a full report tomorrow.” Edward said.

“Noted.” Charlotte responded.

Once lunch was eaten, Charlotte made her way her two hour Shakespeare lecture and then, eager to clear her head before tonight’s activities, she headed to the gym.

***

Georgiana knocked on Charlotte’s door armed with a bag full of makeup and hair accessories later that day. Georgiana first helped Charlotte root through her wardrobe for something to wear, but the outfit choices she suggested were not at all appropriate for the weather, for they were in the middle of a cold snap… Eventually, they agreed on a long sleeved burgundy dress with leggings. Georgiana suggested some burgundy stilettos to match the dress, which although lovely, were not at all practical. Charlotte instead opted for some smart black boots with a small heel. Next, Georgiana worked for at least half an hour on Charlotte’s hair and make up. Charlotte didn’t have a clue what she was doing to her, but once she had finished her work, she was pleasantly surprised. She had gone for the smokey eye look which really suited her, and a burgundy lipstick to match the dress. Charlotte’s hair was in a very elegant, yet simple up do. She looked nice… but looking at herself in the mirror compounded the nerves she was already feeling. Would her secret admirer be pleased with what he saw, whoever he was. Or was all this getting dressed up for nothing and it was all a cruel joke?

Suddenly feeling insecure, she spun round to face Georgiana. “I’m not sure about this.” Charlotte admitted.

Georgiana smiled at her. “Charlotte Heywood, I did not spend half an hour on your face and hair for you to blow this guy off. Surely there is no harm in at least seeing who he, or she, is?”

“No… you’re right. I’m just nervous, I mean… I have no idea who it could be!”

“Well, you’ll find out soon.” said Georgiana who then checked her watched. “Shit… you’ve only five minutes!”

“Oh God.” Charlotte replied, as she shoved on her boots and went to grab her coat.

“Hey, not so fast, you don’t want to ruin the hair!” Georgiana insisted. “Surely it’s OK if you’re five minutes late?”

“Yes, I suppose.” Charlotte said as she tried to slow down as her warm winter weathers.

“Right, you’re done. Sure you don’t want me to come out with you?” Georgiana asked.

“No. I’m good.”

“OK. Well try and have good time. Send me a text or something to let me know you’re OK.”

“Will do.”

“Good luck!” Georgiana said as Charlotte locked the door of her room and made her way out of the halls of residence.

Nervously Charlotte made her way to the main entrance, known as Tom Gate, in Christ Church College wrapped up in her thick winter coat and boots. It was dark and deathly cold outside. Snow was forecast for tonight, but it was clear at present and the moon was casting its shimmering glow across the the sky. Charlotte came to the gate and paused momentarily, to pluck up her courage to go through it. Taking a deep breath, she turned the corner and her eyes fell on the outline of a tall dark figure who had his back to her. In his hands behind his back he held a single white rose…. The something white. Charlotte’s heart started beating faster. This was him, her secret admirer. Tentatively she stepped closer towards him and when she was a few metres away, he turned around to face her. Charlotte’s eyes widened and she froze mid step as she clocked who it was because it really was the last person she was expecting. It was Sidney Parker.


	2. Part 2

“You?” Charlotte said, the shock in her voice clearly evident.

Sidney smiled shyly. “Me.” He replied softly.

Charlotte just stared at him, completely dumbfounded. He took a couple of paces closer to her and she took a sharp intake of breath.

“You’re not too disappointed I hope?” Sidney asked her nervously.

“I… er…” Charlotte stuttered and she shook her head and screwed up her eyes in disbelief. “Sorry, but this doesn’t make any sense. You don’t like me.”

Sidney frowned a little. “What makes you think that?”

“Because… because you argue with me about everything, this morning being no exception.”

“I don’t argue with you, I debate…” Sidney maintained.

“What is the difference exactly?”

“The difference is, in tutorials we are having an academic debate. An argument would be more… personal.”

Charlotte scowled at him and she felt rather defensive. “Jane Austen is personal to me. She is my favourite author of all time… she’s the reason I’m here studying for this degree and you seek to undermine and pick apart everything I admire about her stories.” She replied adamantly.

“That’s not my intention at all.” Sidney said, pausing momentarily to try and find the right words. This was not going as he had planned. “I’m sorry if you think that. For what it’s worth I really admire the passion with which you present your arguments. You’ve nearly had me convinced on several occasions. Debating with you is the only reason I’ve stuck with the module this Semester.”

Charlotte was so confused and Sidney sensed that he needed to say more.

“Look, I know that I haven’t made a very good impression so far, but the fact is that I like you, Charlotte. And I would really like to take you out tonight… if you’ll let me? It is Valentine’s Day after all.” Sidney asked her.

“You… you like me?” Charlotte repeated disbelievingly.

“Yes. I really like you. Please let me take you out.” Sidney replied, with such vulnerability it touched her.

Charlotte bit her lip contemplating her decision. The person in front of her was someone she had never even contemplated as a love interest because they simply didn’t get on. She didn’t even know if she was attracted to him, but now Sidney was standing here having confessed his feelings for her she properly thought about it for the first time and she allowed herself to take him in. Sidney’s hair was curly, dark brown and in need of a cut, but she had to admit that the curls were rather adorable. He had the beginnings of a beard which made him look older than his presumably early twenties, but it suited him. His eyes were dark brown and piercing, and his pink lips looked soft and (dare she even let herself think it) kissable. There was no denying it… in that moment, Charlotte had to admit to herself that she was very much attracted to Sidney Parker and this realisation caused an eruption of butterflies in her stomach.

“OK, as it’s Valentine’s Day I will agree to go out with you on one condition.” she said, trying to disguise how out of kilter she felt.

The sides of Sidney’s mouth twitched as if he wanted to smile because that was almost a yes, but he held it back. “What’s that?” He asked.

“That you tell me why you took the Jane Austen module when you clearly do not like her novels.” She said as she folded her arms in front of her, a stern look appearing on her face.

Sidney allowed himself to smile then, because confrontational Charlotte was rather, well, sexy. It was the way she pouted her full lips and stuck out her dimpled chin… along with the way her eyes flashed, as if behind them was a raging fire and every time he wanted nothing more than to kiss her senseless. “OK. Well, first of all contrary to what you may think, I do like Austen’s novels. I suppose I took the class because, well, even if her novels are somewhat idealistic, Austen explores the idea of something that everyone is intrigued by… that I’m intrigued by… love… or rather how and why people fall in love. It is a concept that’s timeless and is, philosophically speaking, still rather a mystery… to me at least.”

Charlotte was not expecting this response at all, and she took the time to think about it before asking her next question. “So, has this class brought you any closer to understanding this mystery?”

“Honestly, it’s probably left me even more confused.” Sidney admitted.

“Perhaps that’s because Jane Austen isn’t a philosopher, at least not intentionally, but a literary genius.”

“Perhaps… or maybe…” Sidney began, but then paused.

“Maybe?” Charlotte prompted.

Sidney took a deep breath. “Maybe I just met someone who made things more confusing?” He said, his eyes searching hers and Charlotte thought her legs were about to give way as the deep tones of his voice reverberated throughout her body. She was glad she hadn’t let Georgiana persuade her to wear those stilettos!

Sidney could tell he had left her speechless for her eyes, although usually big and bright, had widened even more and her lips were parted slighted and she was so goddamn beautiful that he knew he would be heartbroken if she rejected him!

“So… Have I satisfied your condition?” Sidney asked, his stare rather intense because everything seemed to hang on Charlotte’s answer.

“Yes.” Charlotte whispered, for she was still feeling rather overwhelmed by Sidney’s confession. This was someone she thought hated her, or at least found her irritating, and now he had admitted that he liked her, and what’s more she was considering the possibility, however ridiculous that may seem, that she may actually be attracted to him too.

“Good.” Sidney replied, smiling widely with relief and they stood silently for a moment longer, taking in the significance of what was about to happen. Sidney extended his arm and held out the rose. “This is for you.”

Charlotte frowned again, still feeling very befuddled about what was happening, but she took the rose from him. “Thank you… but you know, traditionally its red roses for Valentine’s Day.”

Sidney chuckled feeling a little embarrassed. “Yeah I know, but I was struggling to come up with something that rhymed with red in the poem I wrote you.”

“Hmm… Dread? Fled? Bed?” Charlotte said jokingly, although she blushed at the last word, and hoped it was dark enough for Sidney not to see it.

“Yeah… not great options for trying to get you to convince you to meet me.” Sidney replied, noticing the pink tinge in her cheeks and this gave him a glimmer of hope. He knew he was taking a big leap confessing his feelings for Charlotte, but it was getting to a point where being in the same room as her and her not knowing how he felt was unbearable.

“No I suppose not.” Charlotte agreed as another heavy silence descended as she fiddled nervously with the rose in her hands.

“Shall we go then?” Sidney suggested as he ushered her to follow him.

“Where are we going?” Charlotte asked him as she followed him out onto the street.

“You’ll see. Please bear in mind that I’m on a student budget… You haven’t eaten have you?”

“No.” Charlotte said.

“Good.” He said again.

They began their walk at a leisurely pace side by side away from the College and into town, and at first each of them was too nervous to say anything. Sidney felt tense. He had never done anything like this before and he had no idea how Charlotte really felt about going out with him, but he was beyond relieved she had said yes because the truth was he had been able to stop thinking about her for months. Eventually the tension got too much and it was Sidney who decided to break the silence.

“So you didn’t fancy the Valentine’s Ball then?” Sidney said.

Charlotte blushed again. He’d obviously heard her comment in the tutorial. “No… you didn’t either?” Charlotte asked.

“No. I went last year.”

“What was it like?”

Sidney shrugged. “From what I remember, just like you said, full of desperate singletons looking for a hook up. To be honest, I spent most of it drowning my sorrows after being dumped.”

“You were dumped on Valentine’s Day?”

“Yes… and via Facebook.” Sidney replied.

“F*** that is harsh!”

“Yup.”

“Then surely today has got to suck for you more than others? Why continue to participate in it by taking me out?” asked Charlotte.

"Because I needed an excuse to ask you out.”

“You could have asked me out any time.” Charlotte maintained.

“Maybe, but would you have accepted? If you’d have known it was me asking you out tonight, would you have come?” He asked, a slight edge to his voice.

Charlotte thought about this. “I’m not sure. The concept of you asking me out never crossed my mind because I just assumed you didn’t like me.”

Sidney smirked. “Never short of assumptions, eh Charlotte?”

“Perhaps not, but why haven’t you asked me before now?”

Sidney was a little taken aback by Charlotte’s forthrightness, but he knew he shouldn’t be. His experience of her so far had proven that she wasn’t afraid to ask the difficult questions or speak her mind for that matter. He cleared his throat. “Many reasons, but mainly because I thought you’d say no.”

“Then what made you think I’d say yes tonight?” said Charlotte.

“I didn’t think you would to be honest. I was convinced to ask you out because my friends were fed up with my brooding.”

Charlotte smiled at him. “You’ve been brooding?”

Sidney blushed and smiled shyly. “A little.”

This was rather an understatement on Sidney’s part, for he had been brooding for a good few weeks now such that it had become rather insufferable for his friends. It was only a week ago when they finally convinced him to do something about his crush on Charlotte.

“How long exactly, have you been… brooding?” she asked him.

“Er…” Sidney said, nervously scratching the back of his head. “Probably since we had our first argument about Elizabeth and Darcy.”

Charlotte raised her eyebrows, for that was months ago. Had Sidney really liked her for that long? “I thought you said it wasn’t an argument?” she teased.

Sidney looked at her and smiled at her playfulness, for she seemed to be coming round to the idea of going out with him. Maybe his friend Babbers was right and he just needed to be honest and open with her. It at least felt good to have finally admitted to Charlotte that he liked her, like a weight had been lifted and now, he hoped, they could just enjoy a nice evening together.

Silence descended once again, but at least it wasn’t so tense as before. This time, Charlotte restarted the conversation.

“They reckon it’s going to snow tonight.” Charlotte said.

“Yeah I know. Hope it settles then we can have a snow day tomorrow.”

“Snow is OK for like a day or two, but I find the novelty quickly wears off. You know, one winter in my home village we were cut off in the snow for five days. It was pretty miserable.”

“You don’t like the cold then?”

“No… hence the reason I am wearing about fifty layers tonight. I don’t do cold weather. Sometimes I think I was born in the wrong country.” Charlotte replied. “I’d much rather be on a beach somewhere in the Caribbean.”

Sidney smiled at her words. “Have you ever been to one of the Islands?”

“Unfortunately not, but one day I will. Have you?”

“Yes, actually. I spent my gap year travelling and ended up spending a few months in Antigua.” Sidney replied.

“Oh my God! I’m so jealous! I really wish I’d done that.”

“Why didn’t you?”

Charlotte glanced at Sidney. “My parents weren’t keen on it. In fact, it took them quite some persuading to let me go to Uni. It was only because I got the scholarship that they let me.”

Sidney frowned. “They don’t like you being away from home?”

“No, both of them have lived their whole lives in Willingden and I think they expected me and my siblings to want to do the same. They still insist on me phoning them everyday even though I’ve been here for months.”

“You must be close?”

“Yes… sometimes too close. They are rather overbearing at times. I dread to think what they’ll be like when I move out of home permanently.” said Charlotte as Sidney led them round a corner into a side street and then stopped.

Charlotte looked up at the sign of the place they had stopped outside of.

“Angelo’s Italian.” She read out loud.

“Yeah… so it’s nothing posh, but it does the best pizza in Oxford.” Sidney said anxiously studying her face. He had agonised over where to take Charlotte out, not wanting to go too over the top and scare her off, but equally it felt wrong to take her to McDonalds! He’d been to Angelo’s Italian a few times. It also did take away, but the restaurant was pleasant and the food really good.

Charlotte turned her face towards him. “Sounds good. I’m starving!”

Sidney smiled with relief, opened the door for her she led the way inside.

It was surprisingly busy inside, probably because it was Valentine’s Day and they were doing a slightly different menu. Sidney was glad he had booked a table. A waitress came up to them to ask for their booking name and then led them to their table, which turned out to be a cosy corner of the restaurant. Charlotte took off her coat and hung it over her seat revealing her burgundy dress underneath. Sidney stood mesmerised as she did so, for even though the dress had a modest neckline and showed very little flesh, it hugged her figure in the most delightful way, accentuating her generous curves in all the right places and it confirmed something he had already been thinking for awhile now: Charlotte was probably the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen.

His heart fluttering, Sidney took off his own coat and hung it over the back of his chair too. They both sat down and Charlotte put the white rose he had given her down on the table and grabbed the menu in front of her and looked at it. Sidney allowed himself the opportunity to gaze at her as she did so… in fact, how was he going to be able to take his eyes off her when she looked like that? Charlotte glanced in his direction and caught him gazing at her, but he didn’t look away. Her eyes flicked back at the menu, and then back to him again, and this time she held his gaze and frowned at him slightly.

“What is it?” she asked uncertainly.

Sidney smiled and looked a little sheepish. “You look really beautiful tonight.” He said.

Charlotte felt a heat rising in her cheeks and it spread down her neck and chest. She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear and looked back down again at the menu. With the exception of her family members, no guy had ever called her beautiful before and it made her really self conscious.

“Thank you.” Charlotte whispered, the hot flush travelling all through her body now and her heart pumping fast. She tried to read the menu, but she couldn’t concentrate on the words.

“Does the set menu look OK?” Sidney asked her, still watching her avidly.

Charlotte attempted to read it properly, and felt herself go even hotter. There weren’t even any choices she had to make for they had a special set menu for Valentine’s Day and she had spent an inordinate amount of time looking at it.

“Oh… yes… I mean… sorry.” She replied as she slowly, she raised her eyes back to Sidney’s. He was still gazing at her, his eyes dark and bewitching. “I guess I’m a bit nervous.” She admitted.

Sidney felt a little triumphant. “I make you nervous?”

“No… I mean… not usually.” Charlotte said, blushing again and now very eager for a drink. “Do you want to share a bottle of wine?” she asked.

Sidney noticed Charlotte change the conversation, but he went along with it. “Yeah, sure. What do you prefer, red or white.”

“Red.”

“Good, me too.”

The waitress came over and they ordered the wine and shortly after the waitress returned and poured them each a glass.

When the waitress had gone, Sidney held his glass out to her. “Happy Valentine’s Day Charlotte.” He said.

Charlotte chinked his glass and they both took a sip… although Charlotte took more of a gulp, even though she ought to pace herself for she hadn’t eaten anything since lunch.

“Can I ask you something?” Sidney said, putting down his glass.

“Sure.”

“Did you mean what you said in class today?”

“You mean our argument about Willoughby?” She asked.

Sidney smiled and bit his lip, looking a little guilty, but amused. “No. I mean, before the… debate, you were talking to your friends and you said, you weren’t thinking of dating anyone, that you were happily single.”

“Oh… that. Well… yes I did mean it. I am happily single and I hadn’t really thought about dating anyone.” Charlotte admitted. Sidney’s face fell a little, but Charlotte continued. “But that doesn’t mean if the right guy comes along that I wouldn’t be interested. I suppose I just haven’t thought about anyone in that way recently.” She said, as she looked down at her wine glass, her fingers fiddling with its stem.

“Perhaps I can convince you to change that mindset by the end of the evening.” Sidney said bravely.

Charlotte looked up at him again and couldn’t help but smile, for in that moment he looked a little vulnerable. “That sounds like a challenge.”

“I think you’ll find I can make a persuasive case.” He said a little flirtatiously.

‘Hmm… I’m not sure. You have yet to persuade me to take your viewpoint in class.”

Sidney chuckled. “No, but I never stood a chance in class. You are such a fiery debater!”

Charlotte shrugged. “You hit a nerve with your arguments. I don’t think you quite realise how important Jane Austen’s stories are to me. I mean, everyone else was fawning over Leonardo DiCaprio when I was younger, but I fell in love with Colin Firth!”

“To be fair, I think even I fell in love with Colin Firth in Pride and Prejudice.” Sidney said, and it made Charlotte giggle and it was truly the most beautiful sound he had ever heard. He wanted to make her laugh again.

The starters were served and they tucked in.

“So is the 1995 Pride and Prejudice your favourite Jane Austen adaptation then?” Sidney asked between mouthfuls.

“Actually, it comes a close second to the 1995 Sense and Sensibility. It’s my favourite book.”

“Ah… hence why you were so protective of Marianne earlier.” Sidney remarked, but he smiled softly at her, which made Charlotte smile back.

“Yes.” Charlotte admitted.

“And do you identify more with Marianne or Elinor?”

“Hmm… Neither really. I think I’m more of an Elizabeth Bennett.” She said smiling.

Sidney smiled back. “Yes, I think I would agree with you there.”

Charlotte shook her head in disbelief. “Hang on a minute. You agree with me on something Austen related? Can I get this on record?”

Sidney laughed and Charlotte giggled again too. “Yes, impossible as it may sound, I do agree with you on that point.” Sidney confirmed.

“And so what Jane Austen character do you most identify with?” Charlotte asked.

“Er… Probably Darcy.” Sidney said, looking at her nervously.

“And why is that?” Charlotte said, as she took a sip of wine, finally starting to feel a little more relaxed.

“Well, if you’re Elizabeth, then I want to be Darcy.” He said the tone of his voice rich and alluring.

Charlotte smiled at him. “That doesn’t actually answer the question.”

“OK then, you tell me which character you think I’m like.” He said, sitting back in his seat as he too started to enjoy himself.

Charlotte thought for a moment. “Well, I suppose there is a bit of the Darcy-like about you. You’re not afraid to cause offence that’s for sure. You’re proud, self-assured, dark and… and brooding…” She added smirking at the end making Sidney chuckle again.

“It’s settled then. I’m Darcy and you’re Elizabeth. It seems that we are rather well suited, Miss Heywood.” Sidney said.

“Is that so, Mr Parker? Maybe you should remember that Elizabeth took some convincing to see Darcy’s virtues.” Charlotte replied playfully.

“Didn’t she change her mind about him when she saw Pemberley?”

Charlotte smirked. “It was not as fickle as that and you know it! Darcy changed his behaviour because of his deep regard and admiration for Elizabeth and in doing so revealed his best and truest self to her - that’s when she herself fell in love with him.”

Sidney looked at Charlotte with admiration himself. He could honestly listen to her talk about Austen’s books all day, for she knew them so intimately and whenever she spoke of the characters, it was like she was talking about her friends. Perhaps that is why he engaged with her so much in class, for he didn’t care about what other people thought. He only cared what she had to say.

“You really love Austen, don’t you?”

“Yes.” Charlotte replied. “Most ardently.” She added and they both shared a smile.

The waitress cleared their starters and then the main course was served. Sidney was right, it was the best pizza in Oxford. In fact, the atmosphere, the food… even the company was growing on Charlotte and she had to admit she was enjoying herself a lot (no doubt assisted by the wine which had helped her to relax). Conversation started to flow easily. Sidney told Charlotte a bit more about himself and his family and Charlotte talked about growing up in Willingden. They laughed, they joked, they flirted and Charlotte felt increasingly comfortable in his presence. Once she had gotten over the fact Sidney disagreed with her about Austen, she found he was actually a really nice guy.

“God, that was delicious!” Charlotte said as she finished off her profiteroles. Sidney smiled in return, very happy that his choice of restaurant had worked out OK.

“So even if the rest of the date is a disaster, at least I got the food right.” Sidney said.

Charlotte looked at Sidney curiously. “The date has not been a disaster.” She stated and a tense moment followed.

Charlotte’s words compelled Sidney to ask her something, but it would take courage. He took a deep breath. “Charlotte… were you… were you disappointed that it was me?”

She looked at him softly, for his insecurity was rather endearing. Charlotte was all too aware that Sidney had put his heart on the line tonight given their frosty relationship in class and she admired him for it. “I was very surprised, but no. I wasn’t disappointed. In fact, I’ve had a really nice evening with you.”

Sidney nodded, feeling a bit relieved, but there was something else he needed to ask. “Can I ask…” Sidney began and sighed heavily. “The guy you were meeting for coffee earlier today. Is he just a friend or…?”

“He’s just a friend.” Charlotte interrupted, eager to ensure that Sidney knew her relationship with James was purely platonic.

Sidney smiled. “OK.” He said.

“Like I said before, there is no-one I’m currently interested in dating…” She said, and then bit her lip and avoided his gaze. “… but you have made a persuasive case tonight for me to consider changing that position.”

Sidney thought his heart may have actually exploded. Had Charlotte just admitted that she was beginning to like him too? Before he could ask her to clarify her statement, Charlotte said. “I’m just going to head to the bathroom.”

“Sure.”

Charlotte snuck off to find the loos, what had gotten into her? Had the wine gone to her head? Had she just admitted to Sidney that she liked him too? Did she like him? She’d had a truly wonderful evening. It was nice to actually talk to Sidney and not just argue and get to know him properly, and in all honestly, she wanted to know him more. Her heart was hammering violently in her chest as she came to the realisation that this could be the start of something with him.

Quickly she got her phone out of her handbag and got out her phone to give Georgiana a quick call. She needed to speak to someone to validate her feelings.

_“Charlotte! How is it going?”_

_“Good. Actually, better than good.”_

_“So who is it? Your secret admirer?”_

_“It’s Sidney.”_

_“Who?”_

_“You know, the guy from my Jane Austen class.”_

_“The wanker that you hate?”_

_“I don’t hate him.”_

_“But you always grumble about him.”_

_“That’s because he winds me up in class.”_

_“But… but he likes you?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Do you like him?”_

_“I… Oh Georgie, this is going to sound crazy, but yes I think so… He’s… he’s not what I was expecting, but I find I’m having a really nice evening.”_

_“Huh. Maybe you are a romantic after all?”_

_“I’m not sure about that. I can’t really believe this is happening. I thought we hated each other.”_

_“Hate and love often go hand in hand.”_

_“Look I can’t chat long, I’ve just snuck out to the bathroom.”_

_“OK, well, try not to overthink it and just enjoy yourself Charlotte.”_

_“I’ll try. Thanks Georgie.”_

_“OK, bye.”_

_“Bye.”_

Charlotte headed back to the Sidney who offered her a genuine and gorgeous smile as she sat back down opposite him that made her stomach flip.

“Shall we make a move?” Sidney suggested.

“Sure.” Charlotte said.

Sidney settled the bill and after putting on their coats they headed to the exit. Charlotte grabbed the white rose Sidney had given her and tucked it through a button hole in her coat. When they got to the front of the restaurant, they could see that it had started snowing.

“Looks like you were right about the snow. Wonder if it will settle?” Sidney observed.

“They said it would get quite heavy, so I expect it will.”

They exited the restaurant and instantly the cold hit Charlotte and she shivered, making Sidney chuckle. She started to rub her hands together, annoyed that she had left her gloves at her room after leaving in a bit of a hurry.

“Here. Let me.” Sidney said as he took both her hands and enveloped them with his.

The touch of his hands on hers caused Charlotte to shiver even more, but not from the cold. “God, your hands are like radiators!” Charlotte replied with a hint of nervousness.

Sidney smirked in response. Gently he rubbed her hands with his, relishing the feel of her soft skin against his. His caress was delicate and tender and Charlotte just watched as his hands got to work in warming hers. It was surprising sensual, and even a little erotic and it wasn’t long before the cold she was feeling was replaced by a warm heat which started where his hands were touching hers and slowly spread up her arms and throughout her body. If she was in any doubt as to whether she was attracted to Sidney Parker, these doubts were now well and truly banished.

Sidney knew he was indulging himself in being able to touch Charlotte like this, but he couldn’t help it. He was so drawn to her, and not just physically but emotionally and intellectually. She was probably the most extraordinary person he had ever met and now she was here with him, he fully intended on taking every opportunity she would give him to touch her… and kiss her. God he wanted to kiss her so badly and to taste her skin. And so once Charlotte’s hands were a little warmer, he lifted them up to his lips and lightly pressed a tender kiss on each the back of them which caused Charlotte to gasp. Sidney looked up at her. The snow was falling in her hair, her cheeks were pink, her eyes sparkling and her lips… Oh God, he was trouble! Would she let him kiss her tonight?

Unable and unwilling to stop the physical contact, Sidney kept hold of one of Charlotte’s hands and tucked it with his inside the pocket of his coat and then started to lead her away with him back towards the College. As they walked, Sidney continued to lightly draw circles on her hand inside his pocket. Neither of them said anything as they walked for the air between them was charged with sexual tension. The snow was falling heavier and starting to settle on the pavement in front of them. After a short and silent walk, they arrived back outside the Tom Gate, and walked into the archway and out of the snow. Sidney stopped half way through and took their hands out of his pocket. Gently he continued to stroke Charlotte’s fingers with his, not wishing for them to part, but it was time to say goodnight.

The way Sidney was stroking her fingers was so tender and beautiful and Charlotte didn’t want the evening to end either. Tonight had been a complete surprise. She hadn’t even entertained the idea of being attracted to Sidney, let alone seeing him as potential boyfriend material, and now here they were, holding hands and gazing at each other and all she could think about were how his lips would feel against hers.

“Thank you for a really lovely evening.” Charlotte said, her big brown eyes flicking between his eyes and his lips.

“You’re welcome.” He almost whispered, glancing at her lips too which were a deep pink from the cold and he knew he had to kiss her.

Slowly, and slightly hesitantly, Sidney leaned his face closer to hers, causing Charlotte’s breath to hitch. This was really happening and it didn’t really make much sense, but it felt right. She closed her eyes in anticipation and very gently Sidney placed his lips on hers. Charlotte’s lips were as cold as he was expecting, but soft… so soft, like silk and he wanted more. Not wanting to rush this, Sidney slowly started to move his lips against hers, sucking slightly on her bottom lip which was starting to become warmer now it had been enveloped by his. Sidney moved his hands up Charlottes arms, his fingertips always in contact with her, albeit over her thick coat, until he came to her neck where he cupped the back of her head to draw her closer to him. At the same time, Charlotte’s hands came to Sidney’s chest and gripped his coat above his heart as she allowed Sidney to draw her full flush against him.

The feel of Charlotte’s lips on his was as divine as he had imagined, but now Sidney wanted to taste her. Slowly he let his tongue slide along her lip, where he tasted a hint of the wine they had consumed, along with the sweetness of their dessert. Charlotte emitted the most delightful whimper as he did so and she instinctively parted her lips to permit his tongue to enter her mouth. Eagerly, he deepened the kiss, his tongue seeking out hers and when they found each other, Sidney too could not help but moan with pleasure as their tongues danced together. Yet, even though Charlotte was setting his body on fire, Sidney continued to kiss her gently, like he was discovering something for the first time, something beautiful and precious. However, as the kiss continued, he felt himself wanting more and this was not right time. He wanted to do this properly with her, so he slowed down the kiss and broke away.

“Wow.” Sidney whispered, as he tried to catch his breath his thumbs gently stroking her cheeks, his eyes boring into hers. Charlotte giggled a little and Sidney’s face broke into a shy smile.

“Can I see you tomorrow?” Sidney asked a little nervously.

Charlotte smiled for seeing him nervous was so adorable. “Yes I would like that very much.” She replied. “Perhaps we could build a snowman?” She suggested, as their eyes flicked to the gardens where the snow was starting to settle.

Sidney chuckled. “Sounds good.” But still he did not let go of her.

“I better go…” Charlotte said, also reluctant to part from him.

“OK.” He said, as he let his hands drop down to his sides and Charlotte began to walk away from him and he watched her as she did.

Just before she turned the corner away from him, she turned round and said. “Sidney… I’m glad you were my secret admirer.” Sidney smiled widely in response. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Charlotte.” Sidney replied.

Charlotte walked away round the corner, leaving Sidney standing there in the archway with a ridiculously smitten look on his face. He shook his head, barely believing what had just happened and thinking that maybe this was the start of everything he had ever wanted. Then slowly, he turned and made his way back home eagerly anticipating seeing Charlotte again tomorrow.


End file.
